Sunday, November 22, 2009

Simple, so beautifully simple!

Here is Will with all my glorious flowers and balloons! He just figured it is some kind of party!
I am sitting here watching my three-year-old play with his cars as he animatedly tells me what each car is doing and constantly says, "mom, watch this! Mom, watch me!" as he runs his cars down the homemade ramp my dad made out of a board for him this morning to keep him distracted. His world is simple, he sees things so simply, and so clearly. Black is black and white is white and nothing is hard or complicated. As long as he has a Hot Wheels car in each hand and a ramp made out of a board, nothing could be better. He does not comprehend the thoughts going through my mind just mere feet away as I sit here watching him with my eyes half open due to the heavy pain meds I am consuming. he doesn't think any less of me now that I have virtually lost my womanhood by having my breasts chopped off this week. He doesn't even notice. The only thing he does notice is that I have "pockets of blood" which are hooked to me that are the JP drains from the surgery. He thought that was wierd for two minutes and now he is over it. That is how his mind operates. Soon, when I lose my hair, he will comment about how funny mommy looks for about two minutes and then he will be over it. That is the beauty and simplicity of Will. That is the way they came to us straight from heaven---simple, and beautiful and able to understand more than any of the greatest scholars in mere minutes. They realize, without even noticing, that my hair or my chest does not make up who I am. He thinks of me as the same person as I am sitting here comsumed by a huge recovery process. He does not see a changed person, he sees the spirit of his mother, and that is what he knows and loves. And it is simple! So beautifully simple!


maureen said...

Hi, there! I'm glad that you are back home...and feeling at least well enough to type for yourself. You were in our thoughts in Relief Society this morning--all of us wondering what you needed, and how soon, but not wanting to bother you too soon. Would it work to tell us here?

Lydia Hulse said...

You are going to need a flower truck to bring all those awesome arrangments home! I love how much our kids teach us. I'm wishing we could hang out, love Lyd

Anonymous said...

That's so sweet, the beauty of little children, heaven sent. Just wish this was all over with for you all. Much love to ya. Let me know if there is anything I can do to help this week, next week, the next. Anything k!!

Gwen said...

I love this is also so beautifully clear and simple. Thank you for putting your faith and your thoughts into words. You are blessing my life even as you are struggling to regain yours. We continue to pray for you and love you.